Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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