I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
We had sex on a dog bed..
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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