i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
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I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
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I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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