Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
