I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
