That's when you crack a 10am beer
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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