I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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