just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
