Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
