I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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