is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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