Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
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