I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
