Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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