..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
