How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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