Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize