Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
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