we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
It's blow job season.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
