Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I wish i was in the wii world.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
