Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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