I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Randomize
