belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
