just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
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