yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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