I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
