YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize