My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
