what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Randomize