glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
