Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
