i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Boobs are out for the taking
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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