first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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