my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize