French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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