And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
