are you still at the devil's house?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
