i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
