Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
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