I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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