We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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