I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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