I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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