you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
