I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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