Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Me. At least after what I've been through.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
FUCK WHALES
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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