I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize