belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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