This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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