...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
