I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize
